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- How to gain self confidence
Questioner: What to do if one is aware of his bad habits but still can’t get overcome it?
Pujyashri: One should repent for his bad habits.
Pujyashri: Dada Bhagwan has defined 4 steps to help overcome these weaknesses. Say for example if you have a `habit of smoking’ then you should tackle the weakness using these steps, first step have avery strong opinion that smoking is bad. This should be very clear in your intent. Thesecond stepanalyse in what all ways it is bad for you, you should be aware of the repercussions and be conscious of all the ill effects it can cause. The Third step, whenever you smoke then immediately repent whole heartedly and pray to the God within saying, `O Lord, I have erred, please forgive me, and grant me the strength to overcome this weakness.’ And the fourth step, never ever defend or protect your weakness, by stating, `what’s the harm in doing so?’ ‘Why have they built cigarette factories in this world?’ One should never state that there is no harm in smoking. Instead one should accept openly, it’s my weakness, I am at fault. I too am seeking the strength to overcome it.’ In this way one can gradually overcome the weakness. In case you can’t do it yourself then come to us (Gnani Purush). We shall give you blessings to help overcome it. But prior to that you should be very clear in your intent to overcome the flaw then We shall give our blessings.
Questioner: Do we need to do ‘pratikraman’? (ask for forgiveness)
Pujyashri: Yes, one must do ‘pratikraman’ and should also be aware of its repercussions.
Questioner: One is aware that what is been done is wrong.
Pujyashri: That’s true. The ‘pure soul’ within each one of us is aware of everything. So what
is to be done? Keep on doing ‘pratikraman’, saying, “He Dada Bhagwan! What I am doing is wrong. Please forgive me, and grant me the strength to overcome this bad habit.”
Questioner: I knew it’s wrong, yet I couldn’t quit.
Pujyashri: Why is it so? because of ego. Others would feel you are not man enough. A weakling. So you are prompted to prove a point and to impress them. But tell me how can one create an impression by smoking? Friends around you would tinker with your ego and provoke you with their comments, ‘hey you are a weakling, a nincompoop.’ Once provoked we take up smoking. But do we want to enter such a rat race, we should be aware that this is bad company. This kind of addiction and bad company gradually leads to alcoholism, then drugs and eating of non – veg. follows. A person becomes morally bankrupt our whole life goes down the drain, forget about attaining salvation. Bad company not only disturbs our social life but also hinders our spiritual growth and development.
Questioner: I smoke just for the sake of pleasure.
Pujyashri: How can one seek pleasure in such things? Can’t you have some good habits? Whatever is useful and good in lifeshould be adopted and that which is harmful should be discarded. What should be our intent, we should stay away from alcohol, then non – veg and flirting around should be avoided at all costs. And it’s best to come out of the bad habit smoking as well. Our sincere intent and Dadashri’s blessings shall help us overcome this weakness. Then never ever touch it, even if those friends threaten to cut you off from the group. Tell them that if they want to have such conditions to maintain their friendship then you are better off without them. Say good bye to them once and for all. I want to be in company of good people.