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- How to gain self confidence
Questioner: I quarrel for food with my mom, everyday. I don’t like the taste of it. What should I do?
Pujyashri: Isn’t your mom preparing the food?
Pujyashri : Do you throw up after eating or it goes inside properly?
Questioner: Goes inside( the stomach) properly.
Pujyashri: It has to go in. Then why should we bother? Let me cite an example of Dada Bhagwan! He was fond of tea. It was prepared on the first floor and then served to him on the second floor. Sometimes it may so happen that the tea would be sugarless. Now what should he do? What you suggest in such a situation?
Questioner: He should ask for it.
Pujyashri: Should he throw out the cup and the saucer? What is to be done?
Questioner: He should ask for sugar and make it sweet.
Pujyashri: Sugar has to be added. Then what would you say?
Questioner: Add sugar to tea.
Pujyashri: “Add sugar”, will you request or speak in an irritated tone? “What? No sugar in my tea? It has no taste. You don’t know how to make good tea?” So, what’s the outcome? Instead Dada Bhagwan would deal differently. He would sip in the tea and say to himself, “It is sweet, it is very sweet, it is so sweet”, and finish it. Do you feel the taste once it has gone through the taste buds?
Pujyashri: Therefore, it is all psychological effect only. By saying, “It is sweet, it is very sweet,” will help you gulp it down. If your mom has cooked food with different taste, or if it is uncooked or tasteless, then we should say, ”It is tasty. Yummy! It is so very tasty,” and gulp it down slowly. Will that do for you?
Pujyashri: Then there will be no quarrels with anyone . I have seen people throwing plates in anger. Walls get dirty with stains as if it is some kind of a design! Why such design on the walls? And would reply, “Oh these are stains of pulse.” Would you like to do that? Won’t it look like modern art and save the expense of painting? Do you know the result of such a behaviour? Next life birth in the animal kingdom. The whole day, mouths are covered with a muzzle so nothing can be eaten unless removed. Sometimes, the caretaker forgets to remove the muzzle and they remain hungry all night. Such obstacles are the result of contempt towards food (in the past life). Would it be okay for you?
Pujyashri: Will a dog ever complain if he is served roti without butter? He will simply eat. He may also pull it out from the dirty dustbin and eat some garbage because of hunger. Why so? It is a punishment for sins committed in the past life. So if we commit such mistakes, we will have to suffer. Will that be acceptable? It is better to be wise. Whatever we get is a result of our own account. Still if you desire then you can politely request saying, “Mom please give lemon”, to make the food as per your taste. But do it without any quarrel. However, the best solution is to remain silent , your mom will eat the food after sometime and she will discover her mistakes, so what is the point in complaining? Our understanding will put an end for all kind of quarrels. Do you understand? Irrespective of their actions, we should take adjustments and add pickles, sweets, etc. to our food and make it delicious.
APTSUTRA #3008 - When we desire to have fruit-salad and we get it, the mind is satisfied and! But after eating, the contemplation that ‘this is good and I would like to eat it again’ brings the mind back to ‘life’ again.