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- How to gain self confidence
Questioner: Please explain the true meaning of etiquette?
Pujyashri : Actually there are three words, 'vivek' (etiquette) , 'vinay' (humility) and 'param vinay' (absolute humbleness). Vivek' means to be able to understand and discriminate about what is good and what is bad. One knows what is harmful and what is beneficial for him. This can be done with the help of intellect. Then comes, `vinay' - humility. We 'respect' our teachers and our 'guru' as we need to acquire knowledge and learn from them. So we need to show them our respect. Whereas 'param vinay' - absolute humbleness, is a prerequisite when you need to attain enlightenment, self realization ! When you need to know your own 'self', you have to be absolutely humble. Did you understand?
Questioner: What should I do in order to acquire humility and etiquette matching your standards?
Pujyashri : Vinay' is superior to 'vivek' and the ultimate is 'param vinay'. The more you observe these virtues and appreciate them the better you shall imbibe them. Observe how politely one speaks or how humbly one behaves. You also need to stay in their company; that will help these virtues to blossom. One can imbibe such qualities by 'observing' them. Did you get it?
Questioner: What kind of approach in life shall enable me to acquire simplicity' like yours?
Pujyashri : Decide firmly never to enforce your views on others nor except them to behave as per your dictat as that would create issues which shall further lead to conflicts and create problems. Always remain open for suggestions and views. If others agree on a certain point, you let it be so and do so accordingly.
Questioner: Please bestow me with your kind blessings!
Pujyashri : Yes! Just ask for the strength from Dada. If we pray to Dada and remain firm in our determination to acquire good qualities, we will definitely get the necessary strength and blessings from Dada. Wrongdesires will fall apart.
Questioner: How can one be as natural and straight forward like you?
Pujyashri : After receiving 'Gnarl' from Dadashri I practiced the 5 principles (aagnas) very sincerely and thoroughly. My life simply changed after that. I firmly decided not to cause harm to any individual through thoughts, speech or deeds. In case someone got hurt despite taking all the precautions, I would repent and instantly do `pratikaman'. I never forced anyone to act according to my views and I always stayed away from conflicts. I never longed to derive pleasure from any material things. My main focus was to remain in awareness of pure soul. All of these put together helped make it possible.
Aptasutra 2270: One who is absolutely humble is the only one who possesses fame. Where else will you find fame in this dark era ? 'Fame' is seen in absolute humility. When we react arrogantly to people in general, can it be called 'fame'?